A CHAT

This is the most unique one I've seen - Ask!

  • done with school let's go
  • 1) Put your iTunes on shuffle. Give me the first 6 songs that pop up.
  • 2) If you could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be?
  • 3) Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 23, give me line 17.
  • 4) What do you think about most?
  • 5) What does your latest text message from someone else say?
  • 6) Do you sleep with or without clothes on?
  • 7) What's your strangest talent?
  • 8) Girls.... (finish the sentence); Boys.... (finish the sentence)
  • 9) Ever had a poem or song written about you?
  • 10) When is the last time you played the air guitar?
  • 11) Do you have any strange phobias?
  • 12) Ever stuck a foreign object up your nose?
  • 13) What's your religion?
  • 14) If you are outside, what are you most likely doing?
  • 15) Do you prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it?
  • 16) Simple but extremely complex. Favorite band?
  • 17) What was the last lie you told?
  • 18) Do you believe in karma?
  • 19) What does your URL mean?
  • 20) What is your greatest weakness; your greatest strength?
  • 21) Who is your celebrity crush?
  • 22) Have you ever gone skinny dipping?
  • 23) How do you vent your anger?
  • 24) Do you have a collection of anything?
  • 25) Do you prefer talking on the phone or video chatting online?
  • 26) Are you happy with the person you've become?
  • 27) What's a sound you hate; sound you love?
  • 28) What's your biggest "what if"?
  • 29) Do you believe in ghosts? How about aliens?
  • 30) Stick your right arm out; what do you touch first? Do the same with your left arm.
  • 31) Smell the air. What do you smell?
  • 32) What's the worst place you have ever been to?
  • 33) Choose East Coast or West Coast?
  • 34) Most attractive singer of your opposite gender?
  • 35) To you, what is the meaning of life?
  • 36) Define Art.
  • 37) Do you believe in luck?
  • 38) What's the weather like right now?
  • 39) What time is it?
  • 40) Do you drive? If so, have you ever crashed?
  • 41) What was the last book you read?
  • 42) Do you like the smell of gasoline?
  • 43) Do you have any nicknames?
  • 44) What was the last movie you saw?
  • 45) What's the worst injury you've ever had?
  • 46) Have you ever caught a butterfly?
  • 47) Do you have any obsessions right now?
  • 48) What's your sexual orientation?
  • 49) Ever had a rumor spread about you?
  • 50) Do you believe in magic?
  • 51) Do you tend to hold grudges against people who have done you wrong?
  • 52) What is your astrological sign?
  • 53) Do you save money or spend it?
  • 54) What's the last thing you purchased?
  • 55) Love or lust?
  • 56) In a relationship?
  • 57) How many relationships have you had?
  • 58) Can you touch your nose with your tongue?
  • 59) Where were you yesterday?
  • 60) Is there anything pink within 10 feet of you?
  • 61) Are you wearing socks right now?
  • 62) What's your favorite animal?
  • 63) What is your secret weapon to get someone to like you?
  • 64) Where is your best friend?
  • 65) Spit or swallow?(;
  • 66) What is your heritage?
  • 67) What were you doing last night at 12 AM?
  • 68) What do you think is Satan's last name?
  • 69) Be honest. Ever gotten yourself off?
  • 70) Are you the kind of friend you would want to have as a friend?
  • 71) You are walking down the street on your way to work. There is a dog drowning in the canal on the side of the street. Your boss has told you if you are late one more time you get fired. What do you do?
  • 72) You are at the doctor’s office and she has just informed you that you have approximately one month to live. a) Do you tell anyone/everyone you are going to die? b) What do you do with your remaining days? c) Would you be afraid?
  • 73) You can only have one of these things; trust or love.
  • 74) What's a song that always makes you happy when you hear it?
  • 75) What are the last four digits in your cell phone number?
  • 76) In your opinion, what makes a great relationship?
  • 77) How can I win your heart?
  • 78) Can insanity bring on more creativity?
  • 79) What is the single best decision you have made in your life so far?
  • 80) What size shoes do you wear?
  • 81) What would you want to be written on your tombstone?
  • 82) What is your favorite word?
  • 83) Give me the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word; heart.
  • 84) What is a saying you say a lot?
  • 85) What's the last song you listened to?
  • 86) Basic question; what's your favorite color/colors?
  • 87) What is your current desktop picture?
  • 88) If you could press a button and make anyone in the world instantaneously explode, who would it be?
  • 89) What would be a question you'd be afraid to tell the truth on?
  • 90) One night you wake up because you heard a noise. You turn on the light to find that you are surrounded by MUMMIES. The mummies aren't really doing anything, they're just standing around your bed. What do you do?
  • 91) You accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what's even cooler is that they endow you with the super-power of your choice! What is that power?
  • 92) You can re-live any point of time in your life. The time-span can only be a half-hour, though. What half-hour of your past would you like to experience again?
  • 93) You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be?
  • 94) You have the opportunity to sleep with the music-celebrity of your choice. Who would it be?
  • 95) You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go?
  • 96) Do you have any relatives in jail?
  • 97) Have you ever thrown up in the car?
  • 98) Ever been on a plane?
  • 99) If the whole world were listening to you right now, what would you say?
  • 100) Give me your top 5 favorite blogs on Tumblr.
Reblogged from Hello earthlings
A CHAT

The following quotations are taken from official court records across the nation, showing how funny and embarrassing it is that recorders operate at all times in courts of law, so that even the slightest inadvertence is preserved for posterity.

  • Lawyer: "Was that the same nose you broke as a child?"
  • Witness: "I only have one, you know."
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "Now, Mrs. Johnson, how was your first marriage terminated?"
  • Witness: "By death."
  • Lawyer: "And by whose death was it terminated?"
  • -----
  • Accused, Defending His Own Case: "Did you get a good look at my face when I took your purse?"
  • The defendant was found guilty and sentenced to ten years in jail.
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "What is your date of birth?"
  • Witness: "July 15th."
  • Lawyer: "What year?"
  • Witness: "Every year."
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?"
  • Witness: "Gucci sweats and Reeboks."
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "Can you describe what the person who attacked you looked like?"
  • Witness: "No. He was wearing a mask."
  • Lawyer: "What was he wearing under the mask?"
  • Witness: "Er...his face."
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "This myasthenia gravis -- does it affect your memory at all?"
  • Witness: "Yes."
  • Lawyer: "And in what ways does it affect your memory?"
  • Witness: "I forget."
  • Lawyer: "You forget. Can you give us an example of something that you've forgotten?"
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "How old is your son, the one living with you?"
  • Witness: "Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which."
  • Lawyer: "How long has he lived with you?"
  • Witness: "Forty-five years."
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke that morning?"
  • Witness: "He said, 'Where am I, Cathy?'"
  • Lawyer: "And why did that upset you?"
  • Witness: "My name is Susan."
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?"
  • Witness: "No."
  • Lawyer: "Did you check for blood pressure?"
  • Witness: "No."
  • Lawyer: "Did you check for breathing?"
  • Witness: "No."
  • Lawyer: "So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?"
  • Witness: "No."
  • Lawyer: "How can you be so sure, Doctor?"
  • Witness: "Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar."
  • Lawyer: "But could the patient have still been alive nevertheless?"
  • Witness: "Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law somewhere."
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "What happened then?"
  • Witness: "He told me, he says, 'I have to kill you because you can identify me.'"
  • Lawyer: "Did he kill you?"
  • Witness: "No."
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "Now sir, I'm sure you are an intelligent and honest man--"
  • Witness: "Thank you. If I weren't under oath, I'd return the compliment."
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "You were there until the time you left, is that true?"
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "So you were gone until you returned?"
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "The youngest son, the 20 year old, how old is he?"
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "Were you alone or by yourself?"
  • -----
  • Witness: "He was about medium height and had a beard."
  • Lawyer: "Was this a male or a female?"
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "I show you Exhibit 3 and ask you if you recognize that picture."
  • Witness: "That's me."
  • Lawyer: "Were you present when that picture was taken?"
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "Were you present in court this morning when you were sworn in?"
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "Do you know how far pregnant you are now?"
  • Witness: "I'll be three months on November 8."
  • Lawyer: "Apparently, then, the date of conception was August 8?"
  • Witness: "Yes."
  • Lawyer: "What were you doing at that time?"
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "She had three children, right?"
  • Witness: "Yes."
  • Lawyer: "How many were boys?"
  • Witness: "None."
  • Lawyer: "Were there girls?"
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "You say that the stairs went down to the basement?"
  • Witness: "Yes."
  • Lawyer: "And these stairs, did they go up also?"
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "What is your brother-in-law's name?"
  • Witness: "Borofkin."
  • Lawyer: "What's his first name?"
  • Witness: "I can't remember."
  • Lawyer: "He's been your brother-in-law for years, and you can't remember his first name?"
  • Witness: "No. I tell you, I'm too excited." (rising and pointing to his brother-in-law) "Nathan, for heaven's sake, tell them your first name!"
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "Did you ever stay all night with this man in New York?"
  • Witness: "I refuse to answer that question.
  • Lawyer: "Did you ever stay all night with this man in Chicago?"
  • Witness: "I refuse to answer that question.
  • Lawyer: "Did you ever stay all night with this man in Miami?"
  • Witness: "No."
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?"
  • Witness: "All my autopsies have been performed on dead people."
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "Were you acquainted with the deceased?"
  • Witness: "Yes sir."
  • Lawyer: "Before or after he died?"
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "When he went, had you gone and had she, if she wanted to and were able, for the time being excluding all the restraints on her not to go, gone also, would he have brought you, meaning you and she, with him to the station?"
  • Other Lawyer: "Objection. That question should be taken out and shot."
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "And what did he do then?"
  • Witness: "He came home, and next morning he was dead."
  • Lawyer: "So when he woke up the next morning he was dead?"
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "Could you see him from where you were standing?"
  • Witness: "I could see his head."
  • Lawyer: "And where was his head?"
  • Witness: "Just above his shoulders."
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "Any suggestions as to what prevented this from being a murder trial instead of an attempted murder trial?"
  • Witness: "The victim lived."
Reblogged from hello sun
A VIDEO
Reblogged from Hello earthlings
A TEXT POST

Anonymous asked: hey. what kind of cheese isn't yours? NACHO CHEESE!! i had a better joke but it's inapropro, remind me to tell you later ... love, your secret admirer (:))

who the heck are you?

:)

A CHAT

not quite sure what just happened

  • him: god ice skating
  • I don't think I've ever ice skated in my life
  • me: lol yea try it once before you die
  • him: I dislike that argument
  • its synonymous to
  • go to prom
  • you won't get high school back
  • that is a terrible argument
  • me: it's not an argument
  • it's just my opinion
  • him: its bandwagon
  • me: haha
  • him: no its a personal vendetta
  • to prerequisites
  • to living a complete life
  • that i have to complete a laundry list of things to do for the sake of doing them
  • me: if you say so i'll take it back
  • lol
  • him: its still a personal vendetta
  • me: don't try ice skating until you find a good reason to
  • him: excellent
A TEXT POST

cool kids at the library

For Psych, we were supposed to act compassionately for 24 hours. To make up for my lack of regular posting, here is an excerpt from the reflection:

I was sitting in the café area with Kelsey as the daily hoard of Redwood middle schoolers arrived to hang out. Some of them seemed especially cocky and obnoxious (I really don’t think my friends and I were that bad at that age). One group formed a circle of chairs in the middle of the café, munching on vending machine snacks and talking loudly about whatever it is middle schoolers talk about. It such a sight to be had, 13 and 14-year-olds acting as if they owned the place, that I had to quietly joke about the absurdity of it with Kelsey. (“We’re so cool we take chairs away from their tables and form new circles! Let’s sit smack dab in the middle of the place so that everyone can hear us and has to walk around us! What rebels we are!”) After they all left to wherever it is middle schoolers leave to, the circle of six chairs remained in their improper positions and two empty chips bags littered the floor. Poor librarians, I thought, it must be depressing to deal with these hooligans every day and realize that half of the kids in that age group who enter the library doors never so much as pick up a book. Someone should go put those chairs back. Then, inspiration struck and I exclaimed to Kelsey, “second act of compassion!” I proceeded to pick up and throw away the bags and carry/drag/push the displaced chairs to the four different tables from which they were so rudely removed. I tried to do it casually and did not succeed. The occupants of the other tables, a mother with a young child and two groups of better-behaved middle schoolers pretended not to see me. I did my best to imagine them thinking, “What a fine act of civic duty. There is hope for humanity after all” rather than, “Boy, this guy sure looks like an idiot moving those chairs. Who does he think he is, the custodian?” Alas, I will never know what they actually thought, but I could feel good about the fact that the librarians that I had once annoyed in my less mature years had one fewer sorry sight to see that day.


A TEXT POST

chachanging asked: A spotify ad just informed me: "Always get the lyrics wrong? Stop mumbling and start singing!" I might take a hint... or I might choose not to.

i do not see the question in this, but yes, you should start learning lyrics. i’ll cite a few examples

secrets: “tell me what you want from meee”

single ladies: “i’m a single lady, i’m a single lady…”

paradise: “mumble mumble mumble.. PARA-PARA-PARADISEE” 

actually i do that on the last one too